Days getting shorter

I am on holiday for a whole week while Abby and Alex are at school! Not that they are happy about it... But it has given me time to get my eyes checked, my hair cut, a bit of shopping done, cleaning done, and today, a beautiful walk with the Noggin (the dog).

I am still quite besotted with Frodo. And with the English countryside. And with sunshine...

As the days being to shorten, I am clingin onto any chances to be outside and not wet/freezing. I have enjoyed the apples, the blackberries, the leaves changing colour, and the chance to put on boots and scarves again. I have also welcomed back the TV programmes that come on in the autumn. I am trying to be glad of the change of seasons... to enjoy how they mark out our year and complement each other and give us a chance to see new things, to see the cycle of life...

But really, I would like it to be spring and then summer all year round. OK, a sunny autumn like this one is actually fine, even lovely. But, I don't want the Winter!!! I am dreading the dark, cold afternoons.  
Perhaps I need to learn to live each day in all its beauty, and not think ahead so much to what is coming. And this autumn is really beautiful.

Castles in the air

We have had a crazy few days in Northumberland, visiting a part of England none of us really knew before. We were staying with a friend, who kindly gave us use of their house for our holiday. It was only five days altogether, but with the journey each way taking the whole day, we had three days only to see everything - so we basically made six day trips in the space of the three days, and went out each evening as well. I have been reminded that while my idea of a holiday is to relax in a beautiful place, eat well, and see some of the local sights, (without stretching yourself) Dan's idea is to rest for not one single moment, but to go go go go go and see everything there is to be seen, and eat if there's time on the way...

If I show you in pictures what we saw, you will get an idea of the amount of ground we covered...

Northumberland is the north east corner of England, with huge sandy beaches, rolling farmland, moorland including the Pennines, Hadrian's Wall built by the Romans to keep the Scottish hordes out, and many many castles, built over the centuries to protect this exposed coastline from the Scots, the Vikings, and the French in turn... It has so much going for it, including the lovely seafood literally jumping out of the sea into your frying pan (lobsters, kippers, prawns, salmon and much more). Its islands have some of England's beautiful but rare wildlife: seals and puffins. You will know how excited I was to see them, the puffins especially. 

A medieval gateway in Alnwick - the road drives right under it.

Alnwick Castle, home of the Nevilles if you read Tudor historical fiction! Also used as Hogwarts ...

Lindisfarne Priory, built in 635 AD as one of the first Christian sites in England, it was raided so often by Vikings that in 875 AD the monks fled from it with the coffin containing the bones of St Cuthbert and the famous Lindisfarne Gospels (which we saw in Durham). Although the priory was later restored, it was closed by Henry VIII as part of the dissolution of the monasteries, and the roof was ripped off then.

Lindisfarne Castle - built by Henry VIII to protect the coast from French and Scottish invaders.

Called Holy Island, it is joined to the mainland by a causeway so you have to choose your time to drive over. and back, or you'll get stuck... The islands around are the home of seals, who make an eery high-pitched moaning sound which we could hear the whole time.

Bamborough Castle, a Norman castle right above the beach.

a chance to swim in the sea.

A boat trip to see the puffins, at Coquet Island off Amble. Frodo was allowed on the boat and found his sea legs!!

A puffin??!!!

Our photos were hopeless, so this one is from Google... but they really do look like this, they are beautiful and funny!

Again a lifted photo as it was quite dark when we were there... but this is the Tree in the Gap on Hadrian's Wall,  - you might recognise this from the Robin Hood film Prince of Thieves. It is a beautiful spot.

Our family at Hadrian's Wall, including Canis Canis Frodoensis.

Frodo visiting Durham Cathedral.

Another "borrowed" picture, of the Lindisfarne Gospels, made on Lindisfarne in the 700s AD. When the monks fled with it and Cuthbert's coffin, it fell into the sea, but was undamaged. They all ended up at Durham Cathedral, (as did the tomb of the Venerable Bede.) It was trimmed and re-covered by the Victorians. But the illuminations are incredible, original and unspoiled. 

Durham

A medieval street in York. With quite a few tourists in it...

... and a ghost

 I actually feel as though we did "English History 101". It was amazing. And slightly exhausting...

Rookie Gardener

So I have tried to "put my money where my mouth is," inspired by Barbara Kingsolver, and started growing vegetables! (One of the Great British Traditions...) Our kind friends Simon and Andrea have two allotments just near our house, and they gave me some space in one of them to have a go. It has been so fun. I am growing tomatoes, peas, carrots, courgettes, squash, spinach, red peppers, herbs and lettuce. Well, so far they are all just babies, but I am quite optimistic.

Allotments are large spaces given over to strips of plots for growing stuff. They are owned and rented out by the local council, and if you rent one, it is a serious business - you have to keep it cultivated and tidy, and not be noisy and so on. Each person has their own shed complete with tea kettle and tools (I'm guessing), and they do take it quite seriously.



This is my little section. OK it looks a bit messy, but, they all do:

My courgettes, so far, my proteges.

My peas, small but perfect...

Ten Reasons To Take Up Vegetable Gardening:
1. Producing some food (even if only a bit), as well as just consuming, seems to be a good thing to do. Makes me feel I am doing my tiny bit.
2. It it is great excuse to be out of doors in the fresh air for a couple of hours.
3. It is a great way to be on my own for a while, in the peace and quiet, but not "inside my head," as it is physically busy and requires some thought but not too much. ie, it is the perfect escape!
4. It is exercise. I need it.
5. I can grow my favourite veggies.
6. It will save me money, a bit, when I actually harvest something.
7. Working with the earth to make it produce green shoots, leaves, flowers and fruit, being part of creation, working with the creator, is all just very satisfying.
8. Having young plants to tend is like having a hundred beautiful babies to look after, although thankfully different, as they don't cry, and they don't have names. But going to check on them, water them, remove insects and encroaching weeds, and look for their new leaves, does satisfy that nurturing impulse.
9. For me, it is a new thing to learn, a new if small challenge, which I enjoy.
10. It is great to take the children there and let them learn about growing things. They enjoy it too, so far!

I really can't recommend it enough...

The beautiful world

These are some photos we took at the weekend, which we spent in Devon staying with my parents, with my sister-in-law Charlotte and their children, cousins to Abby and Alex. We went on a walk by the River Teign, on a beautiful day - it could have almost been Spring! Alex and April Grace especially get on like a house on fire, partners in crime and all that.

According to Abby Bartels, I love nature because I love perfection,
and nature is pretty much perfect without my intervention. I also love the peace, how undemanding, and pleasing and gentle it all is on the eyes. Give me fields, trees and streams, sheep, flowers and birdsong, any day.

The world we live in... again

This is ironic... Right after enthusing about how Scouts are maintaining a Christian presence in our secular country, and still encouraging boys to "do their duty to God and country" I read this as I was browsing through Christianity magazine:

"Scouts Consult on Including Atheists.

"The UK Scout "promise" may be changed to accommodate atheists and those unable to make the existing commitment.

A nationwide survey was launched last month asking members whether alternative wording should be developed.

The 105-year old organisation said the consultation was about 'finding a way to allow young people and adults who have not previously been able to join the movement to be part of the scouting adventure."

The UK scouting movement has been under pressure from secular campaigners over the religious pledge.

In October it was reported that George Pratt, an 11 -yr old from Somerset, was refused membership in his local troop after he said he was an atheist and declined to make the promise.

Assistant director Simon Carter told Christianity, "The consultation will be open until the end of January, If we do go down the pathway of offering a variation in the promise, there'll be another whole discussion around what that promise says. It's an open consultation, so even if you're not a member, you can make a comment, and we're interested in all views." Alternative versions of the promise are currently available for people of other faiths."
         Christianity February 2013 pg 10

In my opinion, non-Christians should not have to say a promise they don't mean, nor be excluded - but, don't take away the promise for everyone, just to suit the few. What will we be left with?

Alex's Promise

So pleased that Alex has joined the Boy Scouts and was invested on Friday evening. Dan and I went with him to watch the event, in a tucked-away Scout Hut, where an old boy scouter, Terry, who must be 70 if he is a day, manages to corrall a crowd of scruffy boys, make them stand in their patrols, make them all salute him, and then gives them a ton of fun every Friday evening. I take my hat off to him. It was only Alex's third time going, but his friends who have been there for a while rave about it. The moment the evenings get a bit lighter, all the meetings are held outdoors and involve being in the woods, lighting fires, learning outdoor skills. For now they seem to play wild games in the Scout Hut, and build things.

The investment included having to walk across a rickety plank bridge set up across some chairs, and then the usual exchange of questions and the promise, said with right hand held up by the ear in the three-fingered Scout salute.

"Do you know what your honour is?"   "Yes"

"So you can be trusted?"   "Yes"

"Do you know the Scout Law?"  "Yes"

"Do you know the Scout promise?"

"On my honour,
I promise that I will try my best
to do my duty to God and the Queen,
to help other people,
and to keep the Scout law."

In this very secular country where we now live, it amazed me to hear not only Alex but several other boys as well (!) promising to do their duty to God and the Queen. OK, they probably don't mean it... all of them... but, there they are, forty boys on a Friday night, laughing, playing, saluting an old man and showing him respect, inspecting their gangly green-cloth arms patched with tens of badges,
under the banner of promises of honour and trust. This is Good.

I am so glad Alex is a Scout. And I am grateful for Terry and others like him, who give their time, to give boys a chance to live well.

Movember

One of the fun, weird, English things we (by "we" I mean Dan) have been able to join in with this year is "Movember". Men from every walk of life grow moustaches in November, and get sponsored for it, and the money goes to a couple of cancer charities, specifically research into and care for prostate cancer patients. Redcliffe staff together raised about 600 pounds which is great.

Some men looked more or less normal, while others purposely grew silly moustaches, and one Redcliffe guy dyed his pink for the last day. One female student wore a stick-on moustache for some of the month because she felt left out...

Dan grew his biker moustache which I find quite cute...

(better than the Tom Selleck one from his past... )

Storm and sun

Abigail took this picture. It speaks to me of how we live in our small houses in this big world, where storm clouds roll and pile overhead and overwhelm, but the sun still rises, it finds a way, and shines through, eventually, every time. And for that I am thankful.

I don't know if this is a very good poem, but, it helped me in the past and I thought of it when I saw Abby's pictures today:

God has not promised
sun without rain
joy without sorrow
peace without pain.

But God has promised

strength for the day,
rest for the labour,
light for the way,
grace for the trials,
help from above,
unfailing sympathy,
undying love.

by Kevin Mayhew.

The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. A seasonal thought!

A Gorgeous, Sunshiny November Afternoon

Today there was time for my favourite walk of all with Frodo...

We started off at Over Farm (owned by distant cousins of mine),

... passing the now wild strawberry fields, leaves turned autumn red...

... up the lane towards the scary oak...

...  furry Old Man's Beard in the hedge...

... and, unexpectedly, masses of spindle berries, (I had to look them up)...

Naughty, waggy-tailed Frodo ran ahead into the woods, only stopping to look back and then run on...

... loving the sun shining onto a maple tree...

... and highlighting Gloucester Cathedral, a heavenly building pointing up to heaven ...

We were ten minutes late picking up Alex from school, but, it was worth it.

Just thoughts

This is going to be very much half-formed and I will hope to feel clearer on these things as time goes by...

Last week in our small group we were thinking about the well-known and very helpful words, "What more does the Lord require of you, but to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God?" If we are only asked to do these three things (which, granted, are very broad), then, they must be highly important in God's eyes. The so-called Golden Rule is very similar if you think about it: "Love God, and love your neighbour as yourself".

So, acting justly is the first thing required. And yet, for many Christians, justice is seen as a kind of hobby-horse for some, like green issues are for others. I think. Lots of evangelical Christians would see spreading the gospel as more important than fighting for justice in the world. But, here it is in black and white as the very first requirement.

When we discussed the implications of the words for us (asking the question, So what? as in So what does this mean for us?) -  we talked a lot about shopping ethically, Fairtrade etc, and about treating everyone equally and kindly in our daily lives, not wasting resources, and we moaned a bit about the unfair secondary school system in this country and how we don't think we should use our children as tools for the gospel so we go along with the coaching for the grammar schools test etc etc. But then I think we felt a bit stuck. I made the comment that in Uganda, it was so easy to see the justice issues, they were in our faces every day: low pay, people with zero opportunity to escape poverty, injustice in the courts and at the hands of the police, bribery, and the list could go on. And living there, we could on a daily basis do a little bit, to help a few people. Whilst here, on the surface there is a pretty high standard of justice for most people: a fair minimum wage, healthcare paid for by taxes so that it is available to all, schooling for everyone, social services of all kinds to protect the voiceless and disadvantaged.

Apart from buying fairtrade products, and signing a few petitions on facebook(...!), and maybe supporting a child through Compassion, what else should Christians in say England be doing?

Dan and I have made friends with some Redcliffe colleagues, Andy and Carol Kingston-Smith, who have set up a justice inititative called JusTice, with a webpage which seeks to network about all kinds of international and UK justice issues, and also holds seminars from time to time, and they also teach an MA course on Justice in Mission at Redcliffe. This is the link to their blog:
http://justiceadvocacyandmission.wordpress.com/author/akingstonsmith/

So I sat beside Andy at lunch at Redcliffe on Thursday, and told him about our group's discussion. Understandably, he rolled his eyes somewhat, and pointed out that the fact that often Christians are SO unaware of all the justice issues all around us, is a huge part of the problem. In fact he referred to it as the great sin of omission in our time. By being woolly and unaware, we are not just being woolly and unaware, we are actually sinning.

Now I begin to defend myself! I have signed up to their blog and read some of the articles (being honest). I did live in Africa and did a bit to help in Africa's development through higher education. I do try to buy ethically, locally, and not wastefully. I am interested in justice for women, equality, and in preserving the environment for future generations (if there are going to be any).

But I am in no way an "activist"nor am I very well versed in politics, asylum issues, labour issues, etc etc.

And, whilst the Bible is very clear that our God is a just God, who clearly desires and requires justice of us, there are also some ambiguous bits, like the parable of the workers in the vineyard where the farmer pays the workers as he decides and not according to how many hours they had worked, and, Jesus saying, "The poor you will always have with you" as if we don't have to work our socks off to eliminate poverty. But then again, Jesus was born amongst the poor, and mainly ministered among them. And the song of Mary says: "The poor he fills with good things while the rich walk empty away." The first shall be last and the last first. It is harder for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven than a camel to go through the eye of a needle. The upside-down kingdom (I need to read that book.)

But I think there is going to be a new me! I am a convert to the Micah principal. What more does the Lord require of us, after all?

I would be very interested to hear any of your comments, by email if not on here,  - any light you can shed, or suggestions for living "justly" in our western societies...

Seasons are all very well but

When I remembered the joys of sunshine and warmth on your skin, when summer started (not that it ever came to much!), when the light grew brighter and I realised how much I had missed it for all those darker months, I already began to feel a teeny worm of dread for the winter to come, the one that lay ahead. So I was taken by surprise when, as the air felt suddenly cooler and leaves began to blow around, that I was actually a bit excited about the change of season. The Bramley apples growing again in our garden, mulberries on a massive tree in the college grounds, leaves turning to red orange and brown, pulling cosy scarves out of the drawer ... OK change is not so bad after all.

But, there are a couple of things I could do without. One is the horrible cough and cold which all of the family have got. I seem to have it worst at the moment. My voice has gone away to nothing. And I am coughing like a dirty old man. My throat is itchy and sore at the same time. Poor me!

The other annoying thing is the way our car steams up. I have noticed it is worse than other cars, and I have discovered that Renaults have a quirk in the air conditioning which means that water gets stuck in it and makes the car fog up. Last winter we kept a towel in the car and had to wipe the windows down every time we got in. This year I have bought a dehumidifier for the car, which is like a fat cushion which absorbs moisture - so far it has worked well.

But, in the spirit of counting a thousand gifts, this post is not going too well... Later in Ann Voskamp's book "A Thousand Gifts" you find out with her that we have to thank God for the "ugly-beautiful" things as well, knowing that all of it is God-given and that he has a plan and loves us. So said with gritted teeth, "Thanks for colds and thanks for fogged-up windows... but yuk!"

A couple of seasonal things I have listed though:
Purple bobbles of blackberries and red ovals of rose hips growing in the tangly hedges.
The Cathedral bells ringing in the dusk from the heart of the city.
The sound of wind caught in an oak tree in an autumn lane.

Woman Returner

I just found out that this is a term for women who go "back to work" after taking several years "off"  during the baby and young children phase. There is so much that could be said about that statement... But my point is about the returning - to the formal workplace, shall we say.

Last November I started working as the librarian at WTC (Westminster Theological Centre) - which runs theology courses, taught in teaching centres dotted all over the UK.

In the beginning I had a lot to learn, since much of the job is computer-based, using Excel and an on-line cataloging system which I did not know before. And it was the first time I have ever worked in an office situation for any length of time. I have done some temp-ing jobs in offices before, which were always different and interesting in their own ways, but only for a few days so I didn't have to invest myself in them really at all. (But I have some funny stories from those jobs though...)

So this has been a whole new experience for me. In one way I wasn't exactly a "Woman Returner" because I had been teaching a bit and ordering books and helping run a library in Uganda, so I wasn't purely the at-home Mum. But, there is a big shock for the returning "missionary wife" who I believe comes into a category all of her own.

All my life in Africa I viewed myself as the missionary, not the missionary wife. I went out to Zambia to work full time, and even when I had babies, after maternity leave I worked full time because childcare was so affordable, lovely, and so do-able in that my babies and "Amai" came with me to work.

But when we were in Uganda with slightly older children, and I was trying to do an hour-long school trip, drive home and lecture, as well as everything else I was involved with, I reached a point of extreme tiredness, irritability, and disaffection with Uganda and mission - and I came down with shingles, and finally I decided I had to stop working for a while. I took a few terms off teaching, lived the ex-pat life a bit, had coffee with other school mums in town, took up art classes, and then did a writing course, and life became more manageable. Especially when other families joined in the school commute, and basically saved my bacon!

Then after a while I did begin to go back to teaching, but I kept it quite minimal, one course per semester, and I still hosted a women's students' group and helped with the Children's Library, so I was making various contributions, but not pushing myself. And that was how I finished out my time in Uganda.

With the Daycare children (including Mary Bartels), at the UCU Children's Library

How much a missionary wife with young children and a long school commute should also work, is a question many of us have tried to sort out. You are there because you want to help, you have been called to help, and you are being supported by people back home to help - who might even have expectations of you - but you also have to not burn out, (which I think I nearly did),  and you also have your unavoidable and overarching role of caring for your children and your husband, who might also be pushing himself to burn-out point in some cases.

And just being a mum of small children in a developing country which is not originally your home, with no grandparents or aunties around, (only adopted ones, which are also great...), is stretching and draining at times.

So, we all make our own choices and hopefully find sustainable ways of doing the work we feel we are supposed to do while also surviving and even, enjoying! the life we have been given in Africa.

If you are reading this and you are not a missionary (a what?!!) and are not in Uganda or elsewhere because of the peculiar belief that we are there to do stuff to "help," to play a part in showing God's love for people and the world, which is what took me to Africa in the first place, - then you will think we have our knickers in a twist probably, but, you will most likely have your version of the dilemma of working and being a mum - and we all see a need to contribute anyway don't we? and to be busy and to be useful, competent people and not just loll about at home (tempting though that is...) So, I'm sure you get it.

Anyway, the point is, that then when you return to "normal" paid employment in your home country, suddenly everything is very different. For one thing, you are being paid for your time and work, to do a job which has to be done, and therefore you have to achieve what you are being paid to achieve. It is no longer a case of, whatever I do will be useful, and appreciated. Not that what you do matters more, or less actually, but, it is simply being expected of you, and you have to be able to do it - so that's quite a different kind of pressure.

Secondly, if you have been out of the developed world for quite a while, or if you have been outside of a technological environment, you will find that everything has changed and so there is a lot to learn, and people will expect rapid responses to emails, appearance right on time at work, all kinds of techie skills, and there are no excuses like, the power is off, or the internet is off, or, we had visitors. (Not that I would have ever used those as excuses...!)

Thirdly, and crucially, you do not get people saying "Well done for the work!" or "Thank you for the love!" at various points in your day.

Fourthly, there are a lot less public holidays.

I am so fortunate that I work with really lovely people who are supportive, kind, and friendly. But I joined this company at a time when it was moving offices, and going through changes, and everyone was quite preoccupied with all of that. And I had to desk hop for about two months, which didn't help. And I was at the peak of my stress and anxiety about everything. So, it was a pretty rough two or three months, I would say, where although I was so thankful to have this job and loved the people there, I also found it very stressful for quite a while. But it is great now.

So, this is meant to be a word of encouragement to the "Returnee Returner" - going back to the workplace is a bit rough at first, - expect it to be - , but keep going, don't panic, trust in your past capabilities and in the abilities you know God has given you, pray!, and it will all be OK in the end!