Re-entry revisited

I am skimming through a book by Marion Knell called "Burn-Up or Splash Down - Surviving the culture shock of re-entry," and it looks good already. Isn't it a bit late to be reading that? I hear you ask... Don't worry, I did read a couple of re-entry books before our return in 2011; I am reading this now to see if it would be a helpful one to recommend to others, and also to see if it can shed light on why I found re-entry so stressful, and also because I will be teaching on re-entry later in my missions course, and also because I want to be able to help others who return from living abroad in future.

These are the five stages of re-entry as described by David Pollock in Third Culture Kids, quoted by Marion Knell on p11 of her book:

"1. Involvement A state in which you feel you belong in a place and society; people know you; you are committed and have meaningful relationships and responsibilities.

2. Leaving A time when you celebrate, grieve and say farewells. You withdraw from responsibilities, commitments and relationships. It is a stage marked by a mixture of emotions, such as excitement, anticipation, grief and guilt.

3. Transition The period when you first arrive in the new situation. It is best defined in the word chaos - feeling frustrated, confused, purposeless, and ignorant, not knowing people, places and social skills. This can affect mental, physical and spiritual health.

4. Entering The moment when things begin to come together and make sense again, when you discover the route map. This is a constructive phase, when a new sense of control is developed, a sense of significance and security. At this point, a person is willing to experiment, to try out some of the newly acquired skills and experiences.

5. Reengagement The point when the person feels secure and involved again, accepted and belonging. Re-adaptation has occurred, and a sense of personal security and identity has been reestablished.

All of this takes at least one year."

Looking back over the year and a half since we moved back here, I can relate completely to this description of the five stages. Stage 3 was definitely the hardest, and the longest. I would say stage 4 started when the second year started, when I began to feel connected and that I knew what I was doing. Stage 5 is very recent, and I think has only come with being involved at Redcliffe again, interacting with the students, and back in teaching. Maybe for me, an important part has been resuming my identity as a missionary and a teacher, and feeling that I am now contributing to God's Mission by helping prepare other people. I feel as though this is the right place for me to be - trouble is, it doesn't pay enough! Unless Redcliffe gives me a full time job... So that is a bit of a dilemma!